Stories of Auroville - Judith
I was two things when I was young. One I was very conventional but at the same time I was always feeling I did not fit anywhere. I was very social but I was never really feeling that I was in the right place at the right time doing the right thing. When I had finally done all the things that were expected of me, passed the exams, gone to university, graduated, taken my teacher training, I went to London. I started teaching at this very conventional school and I didn’t like it at all, so I quit and took on small jobs. My sister introduced me to a guy she had met at a pub who had gone to the Ashram in Pondicherry and was writing a book about Sri Aurobindo’s vision of philosophy. He lived around the corner so we started meeting in the evenings reading Sri Aurobindo’s books. He also told us about Auroville and I really wanted to go. So I got myself together, got a proper job because I new I had to get enough money to travel and keep myself for a year. I had always been more drawn to the Mother and while I was doing all this work I had a picture opposite my bed.
Then the company I was working with was moved out of London and asked the staff to go with them or to be redundant. So I got a nice big payout from the company and bought myself a ticket to Delhi by bus. In middle of June 1971 I got into this bus and drove from London to Delhi. It took exactly a month. From Delhi I took the train to Madras and then a bus to Pondicherry. In Pondicherry the auto driver took me to the Ashram without even asking, of course it was Darshan on the 15th August and Mother was on the balcony.
When I saw Mother it was so powerful. On the bus it was getting so strong, it was like getting towards the light. When I got there I was totally blown away, I have never been this spaced out. I met so many people during this Darshan as well.
So then I had to do my application to join Auroville. So I gave a photograph which was given to Mother and she said yes. It was complete bliss. I went to stay in Aspiration and my birthday came up very quickly. I did not understand anything about this Ashram, how it was working, these stern Indian people bossing you around. I was feeling like a child. We had to sit on the veranda for a very long time. And then of course there was Mothers physical appearance as she really was in the room was very startling to me, as she was really very small, she was so bent and actually had her hair in a bun… but then we came around each of us gave her a few flowers and we kneeled down – I did not have any problems with this kneeling thing, for me it was obvious, from this connection I had, that I could kneel before this person. And she looked me in the eye…I don’t know, she just blew me away completely, she gave me this look and it went so far down into my being that when I came out I didn’t know who I was anymore. I was lost totally, completely. I was dismantled I would say. It was quite difficult afterwards because suddenly…you see I had quite an active mind, thinking and having lots of theories about things, after all I studied economics and politics, these kind of things, sociology, so I was very strong mentally in that sense and it was as if she just took a duster and pffft! there was nothing there and my mind went completely blank. But unfortunately I had not done all the work you have to do so that just left my vital going completely crazy, see what is was, experience it somehow because there was no clamping down, the mental things were no longer there so much.
This is an excerpt from the book ‘Turning Points’ by Auroville Press.
To purchase the same have a look here.